Dr Ramani Durvasula said six distinct different types all act differently
A doctor has explained that there are actually six different types of narcissist and laid out how you can tell them apart.
Psychology professor Dr Ramani Durvasula has spoken out about narcissists quite a lot and offered plenty of advice for people looking to cope with them.
In the past, she's spoken about the red flags which people can look out for to spot whether someone is a narcissist, and suggested that you could try something called a 'bird test' if you think you're in a relationship with one.
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Recently, she appeared on The Big Bang Theory star Mayim Bialik's show to discuss narcissism and the six kinds of narcissist, describing the differences between them.
The grandiose narcissist
This was the first and most obvious one, with Dr Durvasula saying they were 'our classic narcissist'.
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She described them as 'the preening, arrogant, pretentious, attention-seeking, look-at-me but kind of fun' sort of person that you'd probably associate with someone that was a narcissist.
While they were the most obvious type of narcissist, she said the grandiose narcissist might be someone like a 'stellar CEO on the stage' where everyone would get to see them.
The vulnerable narcissist
On the other hand, this other kind was very different and had a far removed streak of narcissism from the clear and grandiose fashion.
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The doctor said that a vulnerable narcissist would come across as 'sullen, resentful, victimised, aggrieved and passive aggressive' as well as being a 'poor me' type of person.
She said they'd be someone with 'a lot of failure to launch' and might end up talking about how they could have achieved something if only other people with advantages over them hadn't got their first.
The doctor said: "Whereas the grandiose narcissist gets things done, the vulnerable narcissist walks around with this kind of hangdog, sad, 'save me', 'how come nothing ever goes my way, why isn't anyone nicer to me?'"
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She added that 'they can get quite angry' when things didn't work out for them and that they could lash out with 'vindictiveness', this kind of narcissist had 'a poison to their cruelty'.
The communal narcissist
While a narcissist might need validation from others, the communal narcissist would need it more than any other and seek ways to win over the crowd.
The doctor said that this kind of narcissist would 'get their narcissistic supply by being perceived as do-gooders, as saviours'.
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"These are the people who do all this charitable goody-good stuff, and they're doing it to get validation," she explained of their need to be seen and praised as a great person.
"Not because of a commitment to the cause, these are never gonna be anonymous donors. They need to be told 'isn't she the best'."
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Dr Durvasula then brought up the hypothetical narcissist called 'Mary' and said how this type of person could turn on you, saying 'it can be small stakes but if anyone doesn't notice how wonderful Mary is, Mary's gonna go real dark real quick'.
Mary sounds scary.
She also said this type of person could end up becoming 'a cult leader' if they managed to get enough people seeing them as wonderfully generous people.
The self-righteous narcissist
From needing everyone to see them as a bright saviour, another type of narcissist wants to be the example to others.
The doctor said that a self-righteous narcissist was the sort of person who wouldn't normally 'identify as a narcissist'.
She said someone like this would be 'hyper moral', as well as 'judgmental', 'rigid' and 'cold' in the mix too so they could be the example others would fail to live up to.
Dr Durvasula said they'd often have an 'obsessiveness around rules and order', ticking people off for failing to conform to those standards while having a 'workaholic quality'.
The doctor added that there'd be an element of 'shaming of people down on their luck' and saying that their misfortune must be their fault.
The neglectful narcissist
Going from narcissists who wanted to be centre of attention and hold what they do over other people to those who barely care about anyone else other than for their utility, it's narcissist number five.
The expert explained that a neglectful narcissist would be 'viewing everyone through an instrumental lens' and primarily concerned with knowing 'what function do you serve for me'.
She said: "Everyone in their life is basically a can opener or a coffee maker, there's very little interest in intimacy, closeness."
It turns out that such an approach leads to 'very empty interactions', so you may be able to spot this kind if you know someone who struggles to see you as anything beyond a tool they can use to do something.
The malignant narcissist
Finally there was the malignant narcissist, pretty much described as the worst of the bunch as Dr Durvasula said they had arrived at 'the severe end' of narcissism.
"All the qualities of the narcissist, but here we see far more severe manipulation, coercion, exploitativeness, isolation, menace is always sort of hanging out there," she said of this sixth and final type.
"Malignant narcissism is the last stop on the train before psychopathy."
They don't sound very nice at all.
Elsewhere, she also explains how to be 'gas-light proof', adding: "If someone is denying experience, perception, reality then you don't have to push back, you can say 'I think we are having different experiences'."
Topics: Mental Health
